


4 Times Gestalt was Tempted to Kiss Myfawny, and the time they finally did

by jflowy



Category: The Checquy Files - Daniel O'Malley, The Rook (TV 2019)
Genre: Crushes, F/F, Glengrove, M/M, Missed Opportunities, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-23
Packaged: 2020-10-06 03:16:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20499971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jflowy/pseuds/jflowy
Summary: A look back into the almosts that led to Episode 7. Myfawny said it best. "It's always been you Gestalt."





	1. Eliza

Glengrove was a special sort of hell. It felt like ripping themself apart each day as they practiced becoming separate people. Or at least giving the world the appearance of it. Never the less Gestalt was a good soldier, as they’d been trained to be. So they did as they were asked. The passed every test, developed distinct personalities and generally did as they were told. 

But sleeping apart was challenging. They ached for the scarce moments they were able to be themself. To to be one. Glengrove began to insist upon it as their training grew more and more advanced. It was torture.At least once a week they were punished for sneaking into each others rooms at night. After several outbursts of rage and refusals to train, an unsteady compromise was reached. Teddy, Robert and Alex were to sleep in one room one room and Eliza in another. 

They weren’t ready to give in that easily. They were preparing for several acts of defiance when they met their new roommate. 

“Hi. I’m Myfawny. I’ve just arrived.” A slender brunette reached out shy hand. She looked terrified out of her mind. 

“Ge….Eliza” Gestalt turned Eliza’s mouth into a gentle smile, taking her outstretched hand. The girl looked....fragile but quite beautiful. Gestalt barely remembered a life outside of Glengrove, but they knew that the children who came here were often saved from awful situations. They wondered what awful incident could have robbed her so completely of her smile. She seemed like she would have a good smile. The thought shifted something in them and they made up their mind to go against their nature and befriend someone else. Besides, she looked as if she needed a friend. Perhaps they could tolerate sleeping apart for just a bit longer. 

"it's not so bad here you know " Eliza shrugged. "I can show you around if you like." 

“Oh yes thanks. I’d like that. This place is enormous” Myfawny smiled, just a little and in that moment Gestalt wanted nothing more than to be the reason that smile returned. 

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………...

They were inseparable after that first night. Myfawny hadn’t quite grasped the scale of Gestalt’s EVA. She didn’t yet understand that it wasn't Eliza and her brothers who shared some kind of psychic link. It was just Gestalt. They tried to explain it but it was difficult to deny the closeness she felt to Eliza. Who were they to deny her of her confidant ?

"Do you think Robert has a crush on me ?” Myfawny yawned from her bed. 

“I..Well…” Eliza struggled to regain her composure. “Why do you ask ?” 

“Just sometimes i think i see him kind of staring at me. Actually come to think of it Teddy as well.” Myfawny gazed thoughtfully at her ceiling, thankfully missing the blush that spread across Eliza’s cheeks. Fuck. How could they be so careless. 

“I’m sure it’s nothing.” She hastily switched off the lamp between them. “Goodnight.”

It was silent for a moment until Myfawny whispered softly into the darkness. “I wouldn't really mind if they did you know. But i don’t want to play favorites. You’ve all been really kind to me.”

Their breath caught in their throat and they said…..nothing. 

“Goodnight” Myfawny responded to the silence, turning over and going to sleep. 

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Gestalt was more careful after that incident. They spent more time with Myfawny, with all their bodies, careful not to stare or give themself away. It was just so pleasant to look at her. In the few weeks they’d known her they’d come to see past the anxious shell she revealed to the masses. She was funny, and charming. A bit sarcastic honestly but they loved every bit of it. 

If only she could get past that last bit of fear that bogged her down. She still wouldn’t tell them what had happened before ….what landed her in this place. But she dreamt of it. It broke their heart to wake up to her screaming that she was sorry. That she didn’t mean to do it. It was all Gestalt could do not to take her in all eight of their arms and hold tight until she understood that she was safe now. Instead Eliza whispered across the tiny gap between their beds.

“Are you alright?” 

“I’m ……..I’m okay.” Myfawny’s breath was haggard and shallow, she sat up in her bed. 

“Do you want to talk about it ?” Eliza pushed herself up to meet Myfawny’s eyes. “Is there anything I can do to help?”   
  


“Honestly, no. I don't want to think about it anymore.” They were silent for a moment before Myfawny shyly asked “Actually. If you don’t mind, there is one thing that might help.”

“Anything” The response, unbeknownst to Myfawny came from 4 mouths. Alex, Teddy and Robert lay awake a few rooms over. 

“I share a room with my sister back home and when we have bad dreams...we sometimes get under the covers together.” She smiled sadly, clearly missing her family. “Sort of safety in numbers i suppose. It’s okay . It’s stupid” 

“No it isn’t.” All four of them sat up in their beds. Eliza pulled her covers back and patted the space beside her. “I often sleep with my ...siblings as well. Honestly it’s been quite strange to sleep alone. I don’t mind at all.”

Myfawny slipped under the covers of her friends bed and settled in beside her. Eliza’s breath froze in her chest as she willed her body to remain as calm as possible. In the other room, Alex, Robert and Teddy stared at nothing in particular as Gestalt began their trusty strategy when Lust became a bit too much to compartmentalize. 

_ 100...99...98...97 _

Myfawny’s hand paused from a moment on Eliza’s waist as she turned to face her. “You’re wonderful, you know. Thank you” 

Eliza blushed and they lost count all together.  _ 100...99...98….  _ “It’s no trouble at all honestly.”

“I have a question.” Myfawny’s face was only a few inches from her own in the small twin bed. “I think i’ve misunderstood you just a bit. You’re not just Eliza are you?” 

Eliza took a moment to process the shock then slowly shook her head. “No i’m not.”

“You’re Alex ? And Teddy too ?” 

“I’m Gestalt” Eliza shrugged, biting her lip in expectation of revulsion. People didn’t often understand them. They’d held back on explaining everything about who they were...about what they were, in fear that Myfawny wouldn't be unnerved just like the rest. But instead she wrapped an arm around the blond girl. 

“Thank you for everything. I doubt i would have survived these last few weeks without you.” 

“You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for.” Eliza responded, trying and failing to hide the relief in her voice. 

Myfawny pulled back, settling once again on her half of the pillow and closing her eyes. “I meant what i said you know. I won’t play favorites.” 

Eliza stared back at Myfawny incredulously. This was all so new. This acceptance, this trust, another person that was not them caring about them all, really ** seeing** them. Eliza reached a hand to the girl in front of her, brushing a stray hair out of her face and running her fingers through the short brown locks. Her eyes glanced down at Myfawny’s lips of their own accord and they were tempted, so close the sliver of a gap between them and kiss her, as they’d been wanting to do since they met her. 

They glanced back up to meet her eyes and found that she was fast asleep. Myfawny’s chest moved gently to the rhythm of her breathing and she looked…..peaceful. Four sets of eyes closed as Eliza let out a breath and draped an arm over the girl in front of them. 

Myfawny Thomas saw them as they were. That was more than enough. 

For tonight at least. 


	2. Alex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a reupload so sorry if you've seen it already. I will keep working on Chapter 3

She’d been crying. No matter what her lips said her eyes betrayed her. Fuck Bristol. How could he not see how special she was.

“You can talk to me, you know.” Gestalt said softly, with Alex’s voice.

“It’s fine. Honestly” Myfanwy managed a smile wanting to talk about anything other than why Gestalt had found her crying in a broom closet in the middle of the night. “What are you doing up ?”

“Teddy has Dining Room Duty” Eliza supplied, squeezing next to her on the floor.

“I wanted to make sure you were okay” Alex continued, stooping low to meet her eyes. “Besides. I’d much rather be here with you than listening to Dex snore like a bear.” Myfawny choked out a giggle, despite the now drying tears on her cheeks.

When they saw her dash across the lawn, her body racking with sobs , four pairs of hands had balled into fists. They knew all about her secret rendezvous with that pervert. He was supposed to help her not fuck her. She was only seventeen. She deserved so much more. But she was their friend. She had to make her own choices. Maybe one day she’d choose them.

“He says we’re done. “ She sighed, heartbreak pouring from every word.

“You deserve way better than that prick Myf.” Eliza put her hand on her knee reassuringly. “You deserve someone who truly sees how amazing you are. How beautiful you are. Not some prick with a wife trying to have a good time."

“Someone who’ll take care of you” Alex continued, raising a hand to her cheek to wipe away the last of the stray tears. “You don’t need him.”

“ I could take care of you” Eliza finished.

They were both quiet now, Gestalt’s hand on her cheek and a pregnant silence between them. They didn’t know how to get her to understand. They would take care of her. They always would. Myfawny opened her mouth to respond but closed it again when she saw the way the way they were looking at her. They were so close to her in this stupid closet they could almost feel her breath on their lips. Alex’s thumb absent mindedly stroked her cheek and she looked at him with wide eyes. Like she was seeing them not just Alex. Eliza watched with expectant eyes as they pulled her closer using Alex's hands. So close. Almost close enough to k....

“Shit. We need to go” Eliza breathed out sharply.

"What's wrong ?" Myfawny turned to meet her eyes , breaking herself out of whatever trance she had been lost in.

“The house mother is out prowling. She almost caught Robert.” Eliza and Alex stood simultaneously. "Come on then" Alex flashed a cheeky smile as Eliza reached a hand down to help her up. "I knicked some ice cream for ya . We'd better be off before it melts" They had her smiling again. Good. Just as it should be.

As they ran to meet Teddy in their quarters, Gestalt pondered the memory of her lips so close to theirs.

Compartmentalization.

They were practicing.

Just as they did with themself each morning , they put that memory in a box and filed it away. Myfawny was too fragile right now. She needed a friend and that was just what they would give her. There wasn't time for anything else.

Not today at least.


	3. Teddy

“Can I tell you a secret Gestalt ?” Myfawny slurred. Teddy sat up straight holding the phone to his ear while his other bodies slept.   
“I’m listening” Teddy spoke with the clarity of someone who had not just been awoken at two in the morning. 

“I’m drunk” She snickered far too loudly into the phone. This wasn’t like Myfawny . Careful, precise Myfawny normally wouldn’t allow herself more than a glass of wine . Teddy smiled a bit, intrigued. They did love it when let herself loose control . Just a bit. When she wasn’t as scared of her own shadow. It reminded them of before. Before the fire, before Bristol. How much more open she’d been then. 

“Didn’tcha have a date tonight ?” Gestalt brought themself back to reality , enjoying the moment. 

“Well I thought so. But from the night that i’ve had i’m sure it must have simply been a very boring business meeting. ” Myfawny grumbled. “Ah well it’s for the best. I’d be better off dying alone than with that corny twat Ingrid set me up with.” 

“Language.” Teddy chided jokingly, already picking up his keys. “Where are you ? I’m on my way to get you .” 

“My knight in shining armour.” She sighed. “I’m at that Irish pub near work. See you sooooonnn.” 

It took them barely five minutes to be out the door and on their way. They’d been proud of Myfawny for agreeing to the date. Jealous of course, but proud nonetheless. Since the incident with Bristol she’d barely shown interest in anyone. She wasn’t willing to give anyone her trust again. Save for Gestalt of course. But they hadn’t wanted to be the rebound, the first after Bristol. 

They didn’t want to be something she took because it was convenient. They wanted to be chosen.They knew they should probably feel a bit guilty for the satisfaction they felt at the date not going well. Myfawny was their friend. They wanted her to be happy, but a part of them knew what they wanted was for her to be happy with them. 

All in due time . 

Teddy pulled in front of the old green building whose peeling sign read “Mc & Sons”. They’d gotten may a drink in this bar after a hard days work. Before they even turned the engine off, they saw her. She was dressed in this little red number that lit fires in the pits of Gestalt’s imagination. They swallowed, opening the door as she approached. 

“Need a lift ?” Teddy’s smooth drawl sounded far calmer than they felt. 

“Why thank you Sir.” Myfawny slid into the car with a laugh. “What would I do without you.” 

“I suppose you would have to call a taxi.” Teddy teased, they both chuckled in response. As if Gestalt would let that happen. They’d rather be certain she was home safe.   
“In this dress ? I’d feel ridiculous.” Myfawny feigned a gasp. 

“There’s nothing ridiculous about that dress. “ Teddy bit his lip momentarily before moving on. “I’m surprised your date didn’t try to take it off ya.” 

“Well. It was a terrible date. So i doubt i’d have given him the chance.” 

“His loss.” Teddy muttered lowly. 

“You know I don't know why I bothered going on this stupid blind date.” Myfawny continued chucking her shoes off . “We both know we’re just gonna grow old on some farm somewhere . With sheep.” She said decidedly “Lots and lots of sheep.” 

“Were you going to tell me about this grand plan or was I just going to wake up in the countryside someday.” Teddy stole a glance at her and couldn't contain the smirk that slid across his face. 

“I’m telling you about it right now “ She protested. “Just you, me and 300 sheep. That’s the life .” 

She had no idea what her words did to them. They could picture it. A quiet life with her. No Chequey, no Lugat. Just them and their sheep ( why sheep ?). A simple quiet life where they could be together. Did she even understand the implication. Or was this just the rant of a tipsy friend after a bad date ? 

“Now you’ve got me intrigued. Tell me more about our sheep full future.” 

“Well obviously we’ll have to have a field full of flowers. Lilacs i think. NO. Sunflowers. And….” She continued on, ranting about the life they were destined to live. Gestalt smiled, a pleasure they seldom allowed Teddy. His body was for fear and arrogance. A smirk was the most they allowed themself in this body. But the joy radiating from Myfawny was enough . They felt so whole when they were with her. No need for pretense. She didn’t startle at seeing Teddy smile because she didn’t see Teddy. She saw Gestalt. She always had. 

She finished her rant about their beautiful farm in the English countryside just as they were arriving at her flat. 

“And all the sheep will have hair just like Alex” She laughed, raising an eye to his own hair . “Or your if you’d quit the bloody product. Nah. I think both suit you quite well. In any case, thank you good sir.” She opened her door and stepped out, fully expecting him to drive away. 

“Just a minute. Let me walk you up.” Teddy stepped out , rounding the car and offering a hand. “Off we go.” 

“We’d better hurry before someone sees Teddy acting quite so gallantly. The damage it would do to your reputation.” Myfawny teased. 

“Ha ha.” Gestalt rolled their eyes. “I’m not exactly going to be interrogating you tonight. I think i can turn down the gruffness a tad. Besides i’ll have to practice for when we move to that farm. If the only things around are sheep i won’t exactly have much use for this tough persona.”

“Well obviously you’ll need it to scare the wolves away.” They’d made it up the elevator now and her head had drifted down to his shoulder. She was more comfortable with them than with anyone. God, this was nice. Just this. 

They made it to the door in between big bad wolf jokes and Myfawny leaned against it, smiling. 

“Thank you . I’d be lost without you Gestalt. “ She didn’t exactly throw herself into their arms, it was more like a gentle sigh that moved her there. Their arms wrapped around her without question and they breathed in the scent of rose oil they knew she used religiously. She smiled up at them and their breath caught in their throat. At their home, three pairs of eyes stared up at the ceiling, awoken by sheer anticipation. 

“My pleasure. “ They all but whispered. 

Myfawny’s smile called to them, her pale pink lipstick looked so fucking inviting. Here she was, in their arms after declaring her intent to practically run away with them. She closed her eyes, seeming more at peace than they’d seen her in so long. Too long. 

They lowered their face to hers.

And placed a gentle kiss…..on her forehead. 

They took her keys gently from her hand, opening the door and walking her slowly to bed. 

She smiled at them sleepily, tucked in and safe. She rarely trusted her safety to anyone these days. Just them. It was a privilege they would not abuse. 

Maybe someday when she not as fragile, hopefully not as drunk. Maybe then they could discuss this farm. Maybe then they could kiss her pink lips instead of her forehead. 

“Goodnight.” They called, closing the door behind them and heading to the car. 

But not tonight.


	4. Robert

“Ya know honestly I doubt I'm ever going to eat again. I’m absolutely stuffed.” Myfanwy sighed, leaning back against the plush tan cushions on the new couch. 

“Well you did buy almost everything on the menu.” Gestalt teased, bringing four pairs of chopsticks up to their mouths simultaneously. Myfawny didn’t flinch. She never did.

They sat in silence for a moment before Myfawny chuckled softly to herself. 

“What is it ?” Eliza asked, puzzled.

“It’s nothing. Honestly.”

“Don’t hold out on me now Myf.” Alex smirked from his perch on her right. 

She smiled. “Did you ever think we’d actually end up here?”

Teddy raised an eyebrow . “Here? In your apartment ?”

“I’m here at least once a week.” Robert finished. 

“No, no . Here...as in...Chequey agents. On our own, free to do as we please. It used to feel like it was never going to happen.” 

They smiled softly without care for which body was meant to do what. Fuck Teddy’s smirk and Alex’s grin. Robert’s gentle smile and Eliza’s confident one.

“Well. I was in that place for much longer than you…” Alex began. 

“ ...and i know how slow time can feel there, but i knew the work was important ...” Eliza continued.

“...and we finally get to do it.” Teddy finished. 

“And we get to do it together.” Robert’s hand covered hers. A simple thing really, nothing they hadn’t done before. But there was something about the way she was looking at them, with such fondness in her eyes.

“I honestly don’t think I could have gotten here without you.” She squeezed his hand gently. 

“Likewise.” 

They looked at each other then, with fondness and something they didn’t yet understand lurking beneath the surface of their conversation. 

They’d been at the Chequey for a bit now, rising in the ranks in their own ways. Myfawny had taken her perfectionism and applied it to forms and numbers and….honestly they weren’t quite sure what she did, only that it was important. Gestalt had taken up the mantle Glengrove had been training them for their entire life: “ Field Operative” . 

They had very different roles now. They didn’t live in the same building anymore. They were “free” for the most part. And yet there was nowhere else they’d rather be on a Friday night than in the company of their best friend eating some (frankly mediocre) chinese food. 

“Let me help with that.” Gestalt rose to their feet and Myfawny immediately shushed them. 

“I’ve already got my hands full I only need one more pair. The rest of you can sit down.”

Robert stayed up, collecting the last bits of rubbish while the other reluctantly settled back into their seat. 

“Thanks for coming over.” She smiled up at Robert as he binned the last of the trash. “Honestly, I know how hard it is to get all four of your bodies in one place. I hope they aren’t running you too ragged.” 

I’m fucking exhausted They thought. “It’s not too bad.” Robert smiled back. “ Always a pleasure to give you my undivided attention.” 

Myfawny smiled and turned to the sink, filling it with warm soapy water . 

Shrill tones rang out from four identical cell phones and Gestalt grimaced. 

“So much for undivided.” Myfawny joked. 

“Yes. I’ll be right there.” Eliza hung up and with a bit of a frown, stood with Teddy and Alex. 

“I’m sorry .” Alex pouted, the only body Gestalt would allow to be this vulnerable. 

“I’ll keep my promise. I’m going to be just the two of us, like old times. But I need to take care of some business.” Teddy continued. 

“But I’ll be here with you the whole night I promise.” Robert took her hand. 

She smiled briefly, returning her hands to the soapy water and beginning to wash up the few assorted cups and silverware. 

“Don’t be cross with me.”

“I’m not cross at all. We do important work. I totally understand. I’m just lucky i have four of you. So the Chequey can’t take you all away from me.”

Robert visibly relaxed, turning to grab a stray plate as Myfawny did the washing up. 

“I’m so glad to hear you say that honestly i…” He froze, turning slowly to face Myfawny as warm soapy water slid down the back of his perfectly gelled hair. 

“But a promise is a promise, so penance is required. “ Myfawny smiled cheekily, her hand full of suds. 

“Why you little..” Robert dashed to the counter, grabbing a handful of the stuff and smearing down her right ear. Myfawny squealed, returning the favor. On and on the battle went, each fighting to get the other simply soaked. 

In a car outside the target’s home, Teddy and Eliza smiled fondly. At the office , in front of several surveillance tapes, Alex put a hand to his cheek where across the city Robert’s cheek was being covered with hands as Myfawny’s hand gently connected with it. 

Back in Myfawny’s apartment, the two had exhausted themselves with laughter, gotten absolutely no washing up done , and had made much more of a mess than there had been before they began “tidying”.  
They collapsed on the couch in a tangle of two bodies that shook with amusment. 

“Oh dear.” Myfawny snickered, reaching a hand up to Robert’s slicked down locs. “I’ve ruined the perfection” Her hands settled on a stray piece of platinum blonde that must have gotten loose in their roughhousing. In a moment it was back in it’s rightful place, tucked behind his ear. And yet her hand remained, softly cradling the side of his face. 

Slowly, their laughter died in their throats as they realized just how close they were. Gestalt stared wide eyed as they realized what must be going through Myfawny’s head. She stared at them with a hunger they had only wished to see previously. Slowly, her eyes moved from being locked with theirs to moving , however briefly, to glance at their lips. 

Gestalt took a breath. Was she going to…..Should they…

“Gestalt..” She began, pulling closer to them shyly. The lights above them began to flicker and pulse, and the tell tale buzz that accompanied Myfawny’s EVA filled the room. She jumped off them as if lightning had struck them both and the room was once again calm, bright and quiet. 

“It’s been a long day I almost forgot to take my medication. “ She yelled behind her as she ran to the bathroom to pop the blue little pill into her mouth. 

Gestalt released the breath they had been holding in all four bodies as the anticipation left their bodies. She was still so fucking scared. 

Myfawny stood awkwardly by the side of the couch, all mirth wiped clean off her face. “Thanks for coming over. But it’s quite late, maybe we should call it a night. I’m sure you’re exhausted. Especially if you’re going to be on duty all night. You should get some sleep.” 

They walked to the door in an awkward silence. They didn’t know what they could say to convince Myfawny that she was safe now. That she didn’t need to be afraid of her EVA. That she was safe with them. So instead they said goodnight. She smiled weakly at them and slowly shut the door. 

On either side of that door leaned someone thinking of how close they had come tonight to…..whatever that was. 

“Fuck.” “Fuck”


End file.
